Monday, September 29, 2014


Herxing is probably the worst part of Lyme Disease. Every time you start a new treatment the Lyme begins to viciously fight against the the the new treatment. It is generally a two to six week period of feeling absolutely awful. Not only do symptoms increase but your emotions go wild. Each time I start something new I am scared to find out what is coming. It is a challenge to willingly make yourself miserable in order to get to the end goal of feeling better.

A few months ago I was really struggling with this concept. Why does it have to be this way? And then I realized it is so similar to Christ's life on earth. He willingly went to earth knowing He would suffer. All the time He knew that it was worth it. And I am incredibly grateful for His strength and His willingness to endure that kind of emotional and physical suffering. Obviously, I am not comparing myself with Christ. He endured suffering far better than I ever have or will. But it gives me great comfort knowing that He suffered as well.

Shawn and I face another round of herxing. I have finally stopped antibiotic shots after a year. Can't tell you how happy I am to not have to stick myself with a needle three times a week! And now we are moving on to an oral antibiotic. We know it's a rough road ahead. As Shawn said the other night, " [You] herxing is the scariest thing I have ever experienced." I have to agree with him, it is incredibly scary and painful. And I am so grateful that he is always there for me. Even in the hardest days. For that I am forever grateful.

Thursday, September 4, 2014

9 Years

Today I am celebrating nine years with chronic pain. It used to be a sad day for me but now it is a positive day. It's crazy how much I have been through in nine years and yet I am still happy. This is why I can celebrate!

Nine years later, I am sitting in the coffee shop. I can't move my legs but I am not worried, they'll work again soon. Instead of freaking out and calling my husband to pick me up right away, I'll wait a few hours. Why not? It makes me laugh to think that's my reaction but that's what happens after nine years!

I may not do very much but my life isn't boring! There is always a new crazy symptom coming up. And for right now, I'm okay with that.

*The leg thing happened two weeks ago. Don't worry. I'm fine! *